Some hate the idea of being married; some love it. More people hate loving it but most love hating it. It's an endless contradiction and challenge that I am beginning to get use to.
I love being married. It's so wonderful to stumble on that one special human being you crave to annoy for the rest of your life. My husband is not perfect but it's always nice to gaze at him amorously and say to you myself, "This is the quandary I'd love to have".
I love the thought of refuge. The idea that something holds me and my partner if I fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with me until we fall in again. Anyway, love they say, requires falling in love over and over again... only with the same person.
My husband drives me nuts sometimes as I do him, he gets on my nerves and winds me up and it makes me think what being amiable to the same person everyday will do to my nerves. But at the end of the day, all of it is compensated by a sweet, loving and funny man I know I want to be with for the rest of my life.
Being married made me realize simple pleasures in life like endless cuddling, talking, laughing, cooking and being silly with my husband on weekends, our 30-minute time together every day when we can barely keep our eyes open but still trying to acquaint each other about our day, having dinner together each night, and more cuddles in the back of the car on the way to work.
How many working married people achieve these things nowadays?
But it also made me experience hell on earth like socks scattered near the laundry baskets, endless laundries and dry cleaning, toothpastes left dripping on the tub, unmade beds, occasional snores, jokes I take so personally and cigarette butts and ashes on the furniture. Argh!
Then again, what are these small things compared to long lonely nights, Valentine days spent in front of a stupid box drowning in isolation and resentment for those who have someone to celebrate it with, endless dates with mind-numbing good for nothing human beings and bad mornings when no one bothers to text you wishing you a good day in addition to some mushy quotes?
Being married is fun but who am I to say that? I've only been married for more than a month. I know it'll be a long winding road but what is important is that I made a promise to myself and to this marriage that I'm going to give it my best shot and God will be in the center of everything. And I will.
Copyright © 2007 Katherine Whellams