But I Didn't Mean It!
This morning I accidentally hit my 3 year old with my handbag as I was coming through the door.
She said "Oh Mum you hit me!"
I responded with, "But darling I didn't mean it, so why are you cracking up at me?"
"But you did hit me Mum. You hit me and it hurts."
"But I didn't mean it sweetie - ok?" Then I realised that actually, no, it's not ok.
Whether it is intentional or not it needs to be recognised as pain that you have caused another. It really does. She had a little red mark on her forehead and it was in fact my doing... whether I meant to do it or not.
So I put the groceries down, leaned forward, and asked her to show me the mark. I then gave her a Magic Kiss. I said I was really sorry then gave her a cuddle. No more was spoken about it.
It was a really easy thing to do. Much easier than arguing and saying, "It's not my fault because I didn't mean it!" Yes, a lot of things are not intentional but they still need to be recognised as pain.
How hard is it to just face someone, kiss them and apologise?
--- Copyright © 2007 Vicki Muller
