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HELPING THROUGH THE GRIEF

PAGE 13

"Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad."
--- Henry Wordsworth Longfellow

 

My Mom was diagnosed with cancer on Christmas Eve 1999...she fought a great fight until December 21, 2001. The last few months before she died, I was the primary care giver for my Mom. I wrote this one day, while listening for any moans or groans (she couldn't speak in the end). I don't know if this will help anyone else, but if there is anyone out there, that is going through possibly losing their Mom, you can be assured, you aren't the only one

AND THEN I CRIED

You got sick, Mom - I was sad; I took care of you and never gave up. I waited till your pain was gone and you were asleep.... and then I cried.

I was there when you woke up and when the pain started again. I saw the fear in your eyes. I held your hand until you smiled and turned your head....and then I cried.

I stood by your bed, and looked at you one last time. I was strong for you, and knew that you would want me to trust God. I encouraged everyone for you, and waited till they left....and then I cried.

Well, I'm all grown up now Mom. I wish you were here for Dad because now he has to walk me down the aisle-and I have to leave him. When I saw my husband I was happy for a moment, until I realized that you weren't there....and then I cried.

I held my firstborn in my arms today. Many of his little features look like you. He will hear about grandma, but won't ever know you.... and then I cried.

I am aging fast now, Mom, wish you could see me! I'm trusting God like you taught me and still think of you everyday....and then I cry.

I'm sick and frail like you were Mom. Nobody but God is here for me. I know if you were here, you'd love me; I'll just turn my head from the pain....and then I'll cry.

I'm home now Mom, I'm home! Here's the God you taught me to serve. It WAS worth it Mom, you were right....and then I cried.

You were there Mom? I didn't really know. You really saw my wedding day? You said you were and hugged me close. You said you were proud of us too....and then you cried.

Copyright © 2001 Katie Banker

ARE YOU COMING BACK?

As time goes on, I fear the worse
My memory fades; it's an untimely curse
Will I remember your eyes or your beautiful smile?
I can still remember, though it may take me a while

I still can't come to terms with the fact that your life is done
I still imagine you loving me, like a mother to a son
All I have now are hopes and dreams of what will be
And when it's my time mom, it's you I want to see

You will forever remain in my heart
Though we are so very far apart
You were my mother, one of a kind,
Your motherhood is truly hard to find

I still think you will be back, and everything will be all right
But its reality now, reality I must fight
I grasp onto the memories, as if they were gold
I never listen to the bad things I am told

I am living a dream and I realize that now
We will be together, if the fates allow

Copyright © 2002 Jason Lento

I wrote this poem to read at my best friend's funeral after she was killed in a car accident. In memory of Amanda Darlene Sidwell October 20, 1982 - February 11, 2002. She was 19 years old and had her whole life in front of her. I will always love and miss her.

I looked out at the sky today and at the sun's rays
They were shining down and touching the earth
To carry you away.

I felt the coolness on my cheek from my grieving tears,
As I thought of every memory we've made
Throughout the years.

It started back in second grade, you lived just down the street,
I drive past the spot everyday
Where we used to meet.

I remember riding bikes with you nearly everyday,
Then we'd giggle all night long
No matter where we'd stay.

Throughout elementary school we remained the best of friends.
I know true friendship like ours
Never really ends.

When we started middle school you were always there for me.
You helped me be who I am, and my dreams
You helped me see.

As we entered high school we began to drift apart,
But no matter what we went through,
You were always in my heart.

Every time I talked to you, we laughed about the past.
I know these are the memories
That will always last.

We talked about riding bikes and wrecking in the road,
And the time you wet your pants on me,
We never got too old.

And one day you rode your bike into your neighbor's tree,
I used to laugh so hard at that,
You'd get so mad at me.

Then the time we wrecked our bikes and Josh ran over your leg,
And we'd dress up my cats
Every time you stayed.

When we started college we found our classes together.
I was so scared that I'd get lost
But you made me feel better.

Looking now, it's amazing to me how you've touched so many lives,
It's just so hard to believe
We're telling you goodbye.

But I know now that God has given you your wings.
And I know you will be watching over me
No matter what life brings.

Until the day we meet again
I will hold you close to my heart.
For as long as you are there, we will never be apart.

Copyright © 2002 Christina Hull

This is dedicated to my friend, Brandon, who committed suicide.
BRANDON 03/09/79 - 29/07/01


"Although you're gone, I know you're always here in spirit and I'll never forget you for being the friend that you were."

Donna G --- Trinidad

For Michael, who committed suicide in January 2002, in the summer break. I never got my chance to say goodbye. I can only hope that you have reached whatever you saw waiting for you in the next life. I love you Mike, and you're smile will always shine in my mind and warm my heart.

"Go as far as you can see, and when you get there, you will see farther. "

Author Unknown
Submitted by Beck W., Age 16 --- Queensland, Australia

My friend Lauren, thought of this when our dearest friend died in a tragic car accident. We thought that it would never be OK again, but my friend had a feeling it would, and actually it is. The one-year anniversary of his death is this weekend. We are holding a candlelight vigil to help everyone get through. It does help.

"In the end everything is OK. If it's not OK, it's not the end."

Author Unknown
Submitted by Jamie L., Age 16 --- Delaware

Jade Ashlee Doroshwalther
December 5, 1984 - January 16, 2002


I had a good friend, Jade, who died at the age of 17. It happened exactly two months ago. She had diabetes since she was a baby. Nobody thought twice about how bad it was.

She was up to five shots a day. We were told three shots a day were serious. She never let people feel sorry for her or feel her pain. Her smile could brighten up the room. I have known her ever since 1st grade. We were in 11th grade together. This is how it happened.

Jade was sick that morning so her mom called the school and told the people there that she would come in when she feels better. Then her mom left for work. Around 11 a.m. Jade got in her car to drive to school. She got half way to school and realized she needed some sugar before she had a reaction, so she drove back home. She ran inside to grab a candy bar, and then got back in her car, that was in the garage still running.

Before Jade could even take a bite of the candy bar, she had a seizure. She died then and there. Her mom came home around three in the afternoon to find her in the still running car, dead. When the police showed up, her younger brother just got off the bus from school. Her mom called all the family and informed them. She also called the school.

At that time I was at basketball practice and had no clue. When I got home, the phone rang. It was my best friend. She told me to sit down, so I did. She said, "Alicia, Jade died today." I started to yell at her to tell her to stop messing around about that sort of stuff. She told me again.

I hung up the phone and walked down stairs. I collapsed on the kitchen floor. I could barely tell my parents. The first thing I told my mom was "she was only 17."

My best friend was suddenly at the door. We all stayed at her house that night, me and the rest of my friends. We stayed up all night and made purple ribbons. Jade absolutely loved the color purple.

We passed them out everywhere. Our entire grade painted her locker purple. At her funeral, I was asked to be a casket bearer. As I placed her casket into the hearse, I completely lost it. She has never done anything wrong, she was a great person.

Why did she have to go? She was only 17. To this day, things still aren't the same. As I pass her locker, everyday, I think of her. If you get one thing out of this story, get this.... If you care about somebody, tell them! You never know if you will have the chance to do so again. Jade, you're an angel. I will never forget you, ever.

Written with love by Alicia N., Age 16 --- Minnesota

"Even though we lose something great, we will gain something even greater."

Author Unknown
Submitted by Michele W., Age 14 --- Pennsylvania

1/24/01 R.I.P. Michelle ( Shellie Lynn )

An Angel left us today
To the stars she went to play
Up to heaven she flapped her wings
Staying forever Sweet Sixteen
On this day I wept great tears
Why did God have to leave me here
Oh Dear God let her shine
As a Guardian Angel make her mine
Walking down those streets of gold
My Savior's hand she does hold
Michelle you were sent from above
To bring us smiles, laughter, love

Submittted by Linda Frawley

"Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal."

Padre Pio
Submitted by Theresa Markovitz --- Pennsylvania

I've always liked reading poetry but never tried writing it until a friend convinced me to try it just once and this is what I came up with. I'm glad I wrote it; it felt good to get some stuff out. I would encourage everyone to try it.

For my brother, Adam, who died in a car accident June 26th 2001
I miss ya budman, as much as ever (oh and 'who' is my nickname from him, that explains the line about his last words to me)


I found out that night
But didn't cry in spite
It hit me with the dawn,
That's when I knew you were gone

The sun had risen without you
It didn't need you to go on
But me, I wasn't so sure
The pain I felt had no cure

You were the one I needed when I cried
The one from whom I could never hide
But now, when I needed you most
You had to be the one that died

I look back on that day
The day God took you away
I think of what I regret
But really, what does that get?

There's nothing I can change,
I can only thank God we even met
"See ya later, who"
The last words I heard from you

I didn't think it'd be so long
I never would have guessed you'd be gone
But I know I will see you later
I know that you weren't wrong

But when I found out
I had so much fear and doubt
I didn't think I could go on
I felt I didn't belong

I wanted to be with you
I wanted to be gone
Things moved so fast
As we clung to the past

But the very next night
Was that unforgettable candlelight
I've never cried more in my life
All the people hurting was a breathtaking sight

As we move on through the week
Hoping for the closure we seek
We leave to go see you
Though I'm not sure I want to

I don't want to go there
Don't want to admit its true
When I saw you lying there
I couldn't help but stare

It hurt to see that face
You don't belong in this place
Although, you're not here in this room
You're up above, in God's grace

What's it like where you are?
Way up there so far?
I miss you so much down here
It's so different without you near

I can't wait to join you there
That it won't be soon is all I fear
What do you see when you look down?
When you watch our little town?

Do you see me all alone?
Do you see how much I've grown?
You must, because I've seen the things you do
To make yourself known

I need those things you send me
Those things only I can see
I don't know what I'd do without them
It's like you're here again

They let me smile through the tears
I know you'll send more, but when?
As I get older
I can't help but remember you're just getting colder

It's so different with you not around
With you six feet in the ground
You didn't need to stay here anymore
The meaning to your life had been found

But my life keeps going,
The wind keeps on blowing
The sun keeps on rising
The birds keep on flying

But along with you
My soul keeps on dying
But there's nothing I can do
Besides wait to be with you

There's so much I've learned from this
That you, I'll always miss
But also I've learned this hell on earth
Will be rewarded with eternal bliss

Copyright © 2001 Julie Zick

I think most of us have been in situations where we have lost someone that means a lot to us; whether it be a loss in death or relationship breakups. I lost someone in a relationship. My boyfriend; my best friend; my better half; my blue-eyed prince; the love of my life.

He was my good friend in middle school, and then when we reached high school, we became best friends and started to go out. When it all ended, I think everything disappeared along with that love and relationship. I lost my best friend and boyfriend at once.

Moving on was hard, and I'm still not over it. It took help from friends to get me to being okay. It even took me talking to him and getting back to being his friend, not best friend, to be a much happier person, and that was a while after we broke up.

During that time of grief and heartache, I had a lot of time to think, and often I would cry and get angry. Everything happens for a reason, and I needed time to search for a while as to why it happened to me that way.

We're getting back to being how we were before, but it won't be the same, and I need to take it one day at a time. He knows that my heart holds a special place for him, and I will never experience a love like that again. Love can make you do stupid things when you're young; I was willing to give him my hand for life before 18 years of age.

Many people probably have stories like mine but you have to look at it like, "You Have To Learn Somehow, Somewhere, and with Someone"(B. F., 2002). I took my whole relationship and made it a learning experience. Everyday I'm scared that a girl will come along and love him better than I did, but I think he knows that deep down, no one will ever love him how I did. And that makes my life a whole lot easier.

Written by Brynn F. --- Age 17, North Carolina

This is a poem for our friend Tyler Antheney Rezac who died from losing too much blood because he had cancer. We will never foget him......WE LOVE U TY GUY

A life lost too young
A young life lost, to heaven above
Flying away like a beautiful dove.

A caring guy, with a thousand friends,
None of whose hearts will ever mend.
You were supposed to be fine, and come home soon,
But instead you died, many years too soon.

You were only 17, still a senior in high school,
But now you're 17, and an angel in heaven.
Now your safe, away from harm,
But we all still miss your amazing charm.
Our hearts all ache and forever will, because its true,
The good die young.

Writen and submitted by His Homies - Ages 13-19 --- Minnesota

A TRIBUTE TO A GREAT FRIEND

Every night when I lie awake in bed,
I have all these memories running through my head.
Especially this one that I can't get rid of;
The one of January 21, 2002 when I got the phone call saying,
"He died"

I will never forget that day and I will never forget you.
It makes me wonder how your doing up above.
I pray to God every night asking him, why?
Why, oh Lord, why'd he have to die?

When I saw you lying in that casket of a cell,
I wondered if you went to heaven or to hell.
Whenever I go past your final resting place,
I have all these flashbacks of your smiling face.

Hoping that someday I'll see you again my friend,
But in the meantime, I have my whole life to spend.

Sent in by Lil*One B., Age 15 --- Minnesota

I'M SORRY

I wanted to say I'm sorry the next day
But now I will never get that chance
To say that I'm sorry to a really great friend
To say that you never deserved what I said to you
But I said it out of anger
And now I will never get that chance
Because now you are gone
And I feel it is my fault
Because that day I said things I never meant to say
And that day you said
But they have been said and I will never forgive my self
Because you are not here with me and it is all my fault

But even though you're not here to hear me I say sorry
For everything that I said that was mean, hurtfully,
Or everything that I said
Because I was mad at someone else
But you were just there
And I took it all out on you
I just wanted to say I really am sorry
And hope when I see again in heaven
That you will forgive me
So again "I'm sorry"

Sent in by Lil*One B., Age 15 --- Minnesota

For my beautiful sister "Tootsie" from a sister who loved her
(Written to be read at the scattering of my beautiful sister's ashes)


SHE SHALL BE AS THE WIND

On March 29,1928 a tiny baby girl was placed in her mother's arms and the nurse said, "Here's your Tootsie." While we were growing up, that is what she was called, although she was named Gladys. In the seventy years she was on this earth she became brave, bold, beautiful and beloved.

Today, as these last remains of a daughter, sister, wife, mother, grand and great grandmother are scattered to the four winds and given back to the earth from whence she came, we know that she will live forever.... Not only in the Heaven, that God has reserved for those who love and believe in Him, but she will become a part of the earth we dwell upon.

The ever-prevailing winds shall lift her from the earth and carry her to places we shall never know of. She will soar with the Eagle and nest with the Dove. She shall lie with the flowers in the field. Through time and space, she will forever be a part of the wind the envelopes the earth; always present, yet unconquerable and unrestrained. Some times calm and gentle, yet able to change in a moment to a whirlwind of movement, as she could in life.

When I see the wind lifting the dry fall leaves, spinning them effortlessly in space, lithely exhibiting intricate patterns, I will remember a little girl, dancing in a make believe princess gown, pretending she was at a great ball.

She was as the wind can be; both tender and strong. It can lull a child to sleep in his cradle, yet in unchained fury it can level the greatest obstructions in its path. A measure of each enabled her to know when to conquer with strength and when to tender her strength with mercy.

She shall forever be on the timeless wind that derives it's strength and energy from the cosmos of the universe, being one with nature, as a man's body should be one with his spirit.

We shall remember her when the summer breeze softly stirs the flowers in the field; when the thunder claps and the lightning streaks across the sky and the wind swept rain drops wash the earth for another day. WE WILL REMEMBER!

So fly on the wind beloved one. It is everlasting.... It dies, yet it lives ...even as man's thoughts and deeds cannot perish after death, but live on in those he has touched.

Death may conquer the body, but the soul will soar into infinity and Be As The Wind!

Copyright © 1999 Carol Bouche Ottlinger

Dedicated to my sister Connie --- 8-22-29--- 4-16-01

THE LONG RIDE HOME

I walked slowly towards the casket
Where your earthly shell was lain.
I wasn't sure that I could make it,
With my heart so filled with pain.

I kissed you forehead now so cold,
The warmth has left your brow.
And all that I could do was cry,
Dear God! Oh no! Not now!

He answered, "She has done her part
Gave Me her soul and more.
She brought her seven children
To the threshold of my door."

The services are over now,
And the casket wheeled away.
My heart leapt up inside me,
And I want to scream, "please stay!"

Just one more glance before you go
Just one more kiss good-bye.
But the casket rolls on by me,
With my heart still asking, Why?

That's my sister you are taking,
My playmate and my friend.
We've shared so much together
I'm not ready for the end.

How foolish that I think this way
How dare I question God.
We've had our time together
To walk this earthly sod.

The memories that I hold dear
Will always be a part
Of every day I'm on this earth,
Engraved upon my heart.

The motorcade begins to roll
And my thoughts reach back to when
We were just little children,
Thinking time would never end.

I keep hearing children's voices,
As they play their childhood games.
I hear their childish laughter
As they shout each other's names.

We were our mothers dreamers
Building castles in the sky.
We told our younger sisters
When they slept, that we could fly.

Our hearts were both in tune.
Kindred spirits through and through.
Now who will share my dreams
That I always shared with you?

The motorcade keeps moving
And no one stays our way.
Seems funny not to have to stop
For red lights on this day.

They honored you and let you pass,
But I wish they could have known,
That a truly lovely person,
Was on her long ride home.

We enter now the quiet place,
Where our earthly roads would meet.
But someday we will walk again
On heaven's golden streets.

I see your coffin resting there
And I whisper soft to say,
"Today you did not have to wait,
Traffic stopped for you today."

From birth to death dear sister
We've come a long, long way.
Your journey now has ended.
You must go and I must stay.

So good-bye my lovely sister,
My playmate and my friend.
Please know that I will miss you
Till my days on earth will end.

Copyright © 2001 Carol Bouche Ottlinger

This poem was read and dedicated to my grandma who died in September of 2001. She had been suffering for over 8 years and I was very close to her. I love you grandma and I miss you with all my heart.

GOD SAW YOU...

God saw you getting tired,
When a cure was not to be.
So he wrapped his arms around you,
And whispered, "Come to me."

You didn't deserve what you went through,
So he gave you rest.
God's garden must be beautiful,
He only takes the best.

And when I saw you sleeping,
So peaceful and free from pain
I could not wish you back
To suffer that again.

Author Unknown
Sent in by Katie G., Age 14 --- Minnesota

I was with my best friend on the night she died. Three of us, all together, were in a car accident. She was killed instantly. I missed her funeral because I was unconscious for nearly a month.

I am torn between being sad because I did not get to go to it, and being relieved that I didn't go to it, because I know I would have been inconsolable at the time.

That was December of 2000. I still think of her everyday. I visit her grave as often as I can, even though it is just to say hi and get no reply. Though I am still going through hard times now, lots of anguish came from the accident, no words can express how happy I am to have been with her that night. I was with my best friend her last night on earth. Love forever, Hailey.


Written by G.D.

This poem is very special to me because I wrote it in the eyes of my grandfather, who died when I was little.

As I walk through His tunnel, I see a great light
In the tunnel no one kills, steals or fights.
I continue to walk, at least as long as I can,
For at the end of the tunnel I hear their song.
My long journey will finish soon; it will not be long.

As I walk a little further, I see the gates so near.
I walk some more; I have nothing to fear.
I enter the gates made of silver and gold,
Gates of which any mortal would long to hold.

There are many people here, all dressed in white dove lace.
I finally fit in; I have found my place.
Looking around I decide to stay.
I will be happy, I do not fear.
For all sorrow and suffering was too much to bear,
I am in heaven, finally here.

Copyright © 1999 Elizabeth Crisolgago

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."

2 Timothy 4:7 - Apostle Paul
Sent in by Katie M. --- Michigan

"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning."

Psalms 30:5 - King David
Sent in by Katie M. --- Michigan

As I was writing a motivational/memorial speech about a student who passed away in an impaired vehicle accident in October 2000, I suddenly had this phrase pop into my head.

To me it means that we must take the passing on of a loved one and turn it around into a positive situation. Instead of mourning and grieving, we should remember those who have passed on by giving of ourselves, even if it is just by saying "hi" to someone that we see on the street.

Our love is the greatest gift that we have to offer, and we need to give it more.


"Embrace a time of death as an opportunity to say your good-byes.
Embrace each moment forth as a time to say your hello's."

Written by D.R., Age 17 --- Alberta, Canada

I wrote this little poem and put it in with her card for her flowers at her funeral. She committed suicide on Monday the 14th of January 2002 and I will miss her dearly.

Dear Hannah,
I will miss you forever,
And forget you never.
I love you Hannah,
Always and Forever

Written by Ruth T., Age 16 --- United Kingdom

Dedicated to Adam Zick who died June 26, 2001, at the age of 16,
in a car accident


Attentive Driving Always Matters

"People come into our lives and walk with us a mile, and then because of circumstance they only stay a while. They serve a need within the days that move so quickly by, and then are gone beyond our reach, we often wonder why. God only knows the reason that we meet and share a smile, why people come into our lives and walk with us a mile."

Author Unknown
Submitted by Julie Z., Age 15 --- Minnesota

My now best friend Cassie wrote this after my brother died. She was his best friend and losing him has brought us closer. I think this is a great poem and wanted to share it. Thank you Cassie for helping me and also thank you Adam; I miss you.

GOOD GRACE

It seems in laughter our hearts are sad and the end of joy brings grief,
For when the night fell your life was halted and you were taken by a thief.
But God is no thief and your life did not stop,
For your body went down but your spirits rose up.
The human mind may plan the steps but God directs the way,
And he needed you in heaven with him on that fateful day.

We can cry all we want and we can be miserable inside,
We can look at all those terrible events the day that you died.
But God took you for a reason that we may never understand,
He led the way to heaven's gates and took you by the hand.

He said it's time and you looked back at us waiting for a sign,
You needed us to let you go and you told us not to cry.
We bowed our heads and prayed to the lord to keep you in his grace,
We knew as life went on we'd never forget your face.

Up in heaven, now you're an angel all the way through,
And we'll never forget the times we had with you.
So watch over us and help to keep us safe,
And we pray dear Lord keep him in your good grace.

Copyright © 2001 Cassandra Schroeder

"Never let the pain of loss run deeper than the remembrance of love. For if it does, cherished memories will be lost and eternal purpose will be forgotten."

Copyright © 2001 Carrie Banigan

In Loving Memory: Austin Alexander Burkhart

This poem is written on my friend's eulogy card and even though she is gone,
I know she is here.


Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there,
I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft star that shines at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there.
I did not die.

J. Henry Stuhr
Submitted by Ashley S., Age 15 --- New Jersey

I wrote this poem for a friend of mine, who died in May 2001 from a brain aneurysm, which is a rare thing for someone who was only 15 years of age.

MY ANGEL

Words cannot describe
The way I feel inside
Why did God take you away?
Did you learn to fly?

You are my best friend
Death hasn't changed things
Though you are with me in heart
You will still graduate with me

Everyone loved you
Though some never showed it
I love you
And I owe to you my very life

You kept me sane
You kept me alive
You were a great friend
And even a fool could see why

You made me smile
When times got tough
You made everyone happy
When life got rough

I won't say goodbye forever
It's only goodbye for now
And whatever it takes
I will see that smile again

I never thought of life without you
And now I know why
It's dark here without you
You were my shining light

I know you are happy in Heaven
Tell Brooke and Jessica hi for me
And if you would please tell God
That I request for you to be the angel
To teach me to fly

Copyright © 2001 Alicia Estell

BROOKE

When we first met the first thing I noticed
Was the smile on your face that never stopped glowing
As time passed on I noticed your humor
Everyone around you could never frown at you

No one thought you knew my name
But you did
And were still proud
No matter what they would say

I loved you girl
Even if you never knew
It feels good to say
I was your friend too

With God you will stay
In heaven you will wait
For your friends to see you
And smile once again

I will not cry
Nor will I weep
Because I know
You are watching over all you loved

And so as you smile
I think not to cry
And I know
This is not goodbye

For someday in heaven
We will meet once again
And we will reunite
And I can see your glowing smile once again

Copyright © 2000 Alicia Estell

"Pain passes over time,
Good memories last for a lifetime."

Copyright © 2001 Phoebe Paris Wood

In my infancy I had not a chance,
Not a chance to dance or prance,
For before I learned who I was,
I was already shattered, battered, and tattered.

A child unloved, already shoved aside,
Left to hinge upon the shadows,
To reside with the walls, halls of despair,
Already locked outside, outside the family unit,
Amongst the walls, halls of despair.

The child learned, and grew, discovering life,
With all the tears I have cried, all the silent pride,
I still stand outside, never truly knowing the meaning,
The meaning of family.

The years have past, flying by,
Even though my infancy has left it's stain,
I still stand tall, with my pride,
Knowing in the end, I have survived.

Amongst the shadows, I still thrived,
Growing, showing them, beating the odds,
Knowing that as long as I still live,
They haven't beaten me, shattered me, crushed me.

Written in 2001 by Ellen F. --- Connecticut

IF YOU

If one day you feel like crying
Call me.
I don't promise that I will make you laugh,
But I can cry with you.

If one day you want to run away
Don't be afraid to call me.
I don't promise to ask you to stop
But I can run with you.

If one day you don't want to listen to anyone
Call me.
I promise to be there for you
And I promise to be very quiet.

But if one day you call
And there is no answer
Come fast to see me.
Maybe I need you.

Author Unknown
Submitted by Sigrid S., Age 17 --- New Jersey

R.I.P Tupac Amaru Shakur (9-13-96)

In the event of my demise
When my heart can beat no more
I hope I die for a principle or a belief
That I had lived for

I will die before my time
Because I feel the shadow's depth
So much I wanted to accomplish
Before I reached my death

I have come to grips with the possibility
And wiped the last tear from my eyes
I loved all who were positive
In the event of my demise

Tupac Amaru Shakur
Submitted by A.L., Age 16 --- Ohio

"Just remember, it's perfectly all right to be sad because he's not living, not in his body anyway, but you will be reunited maybe soon maybe later, but it will happen. Hold more happiness in your heart, thinking of the time that you had with him, than sadness about the time without him. He's not gone. Seeing him has just been postponed for a while, like a dentist appointment you can't get to, except this visit with him, is one to look forward to.

The body is just a vehicle that God gives us, his just ran out of gas and he's just on his way to the nearest coastal. He still lives, but instead of a heartbeat of blood, it's a heartbeat of gold. It's my belief that God only takes the perfect ones, who are pure of heart, away from us so they can be with Him. I send all my love and support to those who need it."

Copyright © 2001 Caitlin Walker

A THOUGHT OF A DISTANT MEMORY OF WHEN MY HEART WAS FULL

Destiny of time has faded from the time spent with you. You left without a word. Now there is a dismal feeling that reminds me of our time that is closed and passed from my soul.

You said that you would not leave me until I was complete. But now, the glimmer of stars surrounds you; a place where angels abide, where love and the solace of existence coincides. You are where you were destined to be, but you left behind broken hearts and discord among those that held your heart so dearly. Though you're missed, your life was full; not even a moment of the existence of your time was dispelled.

Now it's the beginning for you, but the end of an era for the hearts left behind. You always knew my thoughts of a path before I realized the problems I created. But, you always had the solutions and made everything all shiny and new.

Your love surrounded me all the days as a child. Your strength and love will carry me through. I lay upon my bed in the dark of the night and dream of all the wonderful times we had. I can see you clearly and hear your gentle voice, but then I awake and realize you are not here, but up above where you belong.

Copyright © 2001 Debra Bruce

 

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